Learning from the university called Life

The August issue of Journalism Online, a monthly newsletter produced by Watson Solomon, also known as Nirmaldasan, whose ‘readability monitor’ and the ‘fog index’ (in relation to good writing) have sometimes foxed me, contained a very interesting piece by Tanushri Guchhait who I understand is a lecturer. Titled Things That I Have Learned From Life So Far, it describes beautifully what you can expect from the university called Life.

The real learning, the writer says, doesn't happen inside the four walls of a classroom. “What happen inside those four walls are just discussions on some theories created by some dead specimen ages back, what the university calls its syllabus. If you want to make your own theories and perspective, you have to come out of the four walls as the real learning starts in the outside world. You don't have to do much; all you need to do is live your life and observe things around,” the writer explains, adding, “Life is the greatest university and each and every person whom we meet during our lifetime becomes our teacher, as there is something to learn from everyone.”

Personally, I have always felt that all relationships matter in life, although in our dreary existence we hardly understand or care. And care often comes too late… by then the person you wished was there is gone and you are left regretting not having reached out even once when the person was alive.

As I read Tanushri’s piece, it was almost like hearing my thought echo. Here are some of the things she says (in her own words) that struck me as really profound (thanks, Watson, for circulating this among readers):

There are certain things that I have learned from life. From the people who have come into mine. The people who became close to my heart, some not so close but everyone touched my life in a unique way. You meet people ... few stay with us forever ... few leave us just with their memories but it is their presence in our lives that we cherish forever. No matter how long or short their stay is, it is the experience and the relationship with them that adds up to our experience. Few of the experiences are good, few not so good … but it is these not-so-good ones that gives us the real experience of life and makes us the person that we are from within.

I have learned that to Forgive and Forget are two key things in life ... yes it takes practice but sometimes they just come on their own ...

I have learned that there are certain things in life that no matter how much hard you try you just cannot do. Love and Hatred are two such things. I have learned that sometimes no matter how much you love someone you cannot make that someone love you back … it is up to that someone to decide whether to return that love to you or not … all that you can do is love that someone and no one can stop you from doing so, not even that ‘someone' ... the joy of giving at times is more satisfying than receiving ...

Likewise it is easy to Hate but difficult to Forgive … but I have learned that sometimes it is very difficult to Hate and easy to Forgive ... to say that technically, the degree of `Hurt' is directly proportional to the `closeness of a relation' but the amount of `Hatred' is inversely proportional to the closeness of it ... I have learned that when you truly love someone or the closer the relationship is the more hurt it causes to you but then when you love someone so much it becomes very difficult to hate that person even if s/he has caused you the biggest hurt ever ... you just cannot hate them. Even if you try hard, you just can't.

True love comes without any conditions … it just come from within ... whether the other heart reciprocates the same or not ... it just can't see, as they say `Love is blind' ...

I have learned that the most difficult thing in life is to say the three magic words, "I am sorry", that compensates for all your mistakes, but very few have the guts to say them...